5 Things I would do if I were an aloof yet alluringly infamous superstar

1. I would never sign my autograph the same way more than twice. This way people would not just ask me for my autograph in the hopes that it will be worth something to them one day (famous people have GOT to think this!). They would be asking for my autograph because they sincerely want to have something to keep with the signature of someone they like. Period.

2. I would guest star on Entourage and Grey’s Anatomy. I would guest star as Vince’s, (Adrian Grenier) love interest for a three episode stint before leaving him broken hearted, (temporarily). I would star on GA as the spunky yet wickedly intelligent new Doctor character that comes into the hospital and cast as the “shake up character.” I would come in and all hell would break loose!

3. I would make my friend “M” my manager for her “blocking” potential. When I wish not to have certain stresses and perils of superstardom taint me, “M” would make sure I never knew it existed. She can shank you so quickly, she would be out of the building, in her plush leather, top of the line stereo system, iPoded-out BMW driving away and on her cell phone making an appointment for my next interview before you would even realize that you were cut and bleeding out. (Ha! take that!)

4. Create a non-cheesy commercial for Old Navy (directed by and starring me) for a new line of clothing they will feature for the “not so chunky but not Stick-thin” women (lol). Ok, this one is just plain old gratuitous for me…I get so tired of seeing those cheesy assed Old Navy commercials with the yougins dancing around with zombie like smiles on their faces. I would make one that is classic, simple and stylish. My clothing line would not bear my name, just my idea of business casual and formal business fashions for the fashion conscious yet broke as hell young business woman and man. Hey-the broke need to look business too!

5. Have a Dave Chapelle – style block party complete with my favorite music artists and comedians. Ok. So it would not be a block party in New York but I would rock the best block of downtown Raleigh, North Carolina! I would donate all but 20% of the proceeds to my favorite two charities (the other 20% would go to mom and my people that helped me put it together) and ask the following acts to be there: Maroon 5, Ray Lamontagne, John Meyer, Jill Scott, Nikka Costa, Common, Lenny Kravitz, KT Tunstall, Mos Def, Tina Dico, Talib Kweli, Maxwell, Sade & Sweetback, Nadiya, Anthony Hamilton, John Legend, Prince, Alicia Keys, and The Roots would be the house band. The comedians would be Dave Chapelle and Dane Cook, Stephen Lynch.

Posted by ldbaldwin

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

%d bloggers like this: